Update: 7/20/09

   Well, I now have one week's worth of school work under my belt. Boy, I forgot how much work you have to do. I am learning so much. I'm taking 3 classes and they keep me on my toes, along with Gabby. I got an e-mail from my school saying they would transfer 4-classes = 16 credits, and I needed 96 for my degree. Starting out with the 16 is great. Boy, I was doing the happy dance all over the place. The 4 classes were the hardest for me, two of which were Composition 1 &2. Writing is not my strongest area, term papers are not like writing here. The Lord answered prayers again, thank you Lord and thank you all for praying. But don't worry, I still get to practice writing those term papers. I have three due this Saturday. I printed off a ream of paper, on how to write a term paper as it's been 12 plus years. As soon as I get these three wrote , I'll be fine and breath a little easier.

   This week at school has made me leave my comfort zone more than once. Most times I took a step with shaky knees, and others with a lot of prayer. That comfort zone of ours is a nice place, the only thing is,  you don't grow much there. I believe it's just a resting place.  And I really like it there. :) But I want and need more in my life, so I have step out. The Lord must have big things planned for me as I have not been able to stay in that comfort zone of mine much this year. And that at times has been scary. Like most people I want to grow, but I don't want to leave my comfort zone to do so. So I'm taking steps of faith, one day at a time.

   The girls have been a great help this passed week, fixing dinner and cleaning house, letting me study, etc. As I try and fit my schooling into the day, along with everything else. Thank you girls. :)

   My truck is on it's last leg. I no longer take it to town, just a corner store that is less than a mile away. That way when it dies, I'll be close to home and the auto repair shop. So I have been borrowing a car and shop for two weeks worth at a time. So please pray that I'll sell the tractor, so I can buy a small car. My neighbors have been great. ( another step out of my comfort zone) You don't see having a car as being in a comfort zone, well hopefully you will never find out it is. Sometimes being an independent person has it's draw backs. (yet another lesson I'm learning). Boy, it's great I enjoy learning new thing, or this year would of really, really been hard on me.

   Gabby is 3 weeks old today. She is such a joy to have in the house. Tasha is a great mommy ,too.  Gabby is getting her fill of love, while she gives us her smiles and funny faces.

   The youth group came out for two days, last week. Oh what a wonderful blessing they were.  My yard got mowed, weed eated, garden weeded, some things moved around. What a blessing the Lord sent. As the yard was getting high, and first week of school, He was watching out for us yet again, Thank you Lord.

There are blessings in everyday, you just have to find/look for them, they are not all big blessing. And at times the smallest blessing are really the biggest.

   Well it's time to hit the books. I pray you all find at least one blessing today.

Becky

  

Down at the Farm

It’s been very lively here at the farm. 

   Well those two push mowers would not start again. But I traded the tiller for a newer push mower. They needed a tiller and had a push mower they didn’t need. Thank you Lord.  The yard looks good again.

   Dogs got after my Silky chickens, killing all but 2. I was not a happy camper. A rooster and hen ( sitting on 14 eggs) were left. So I moved them to another pen, and now have baby silky chicks. Thank you Lord.  My nephew, Matt, came by yesterday and helped me make the chicken pen bigger, and reinforce it to keep the dogs out.  Matt also did weed eating, and moved some things around for me. Thank you Matt. I worked his city boy muscles. But he said he liked working on the farm.

   Miss Jenny blessed me with enough homemade clothes soap to last a year. Thank you Miss Jenny.

   The landlords came and fixed the bathroom. I have a new bathroom now and it looks great. They were also kind enough to climb on the roof to open all the vents for me. Thank you Lord.

   Then Tasha’s laptop got attacked by Trojans.  But my step son fixed in a hurry. So if you need computer help for home or business, His company is the best, with great prices. He can fix your computer on line. Please go check them out.  http://twistednetworx.com/

 

Here are some photos from Tasha’s Baby Shower yesterday.

Tasha and Becky( my first grandbaby almost here, Boy I’m getting old)

Ok, Miss Gabby, we are ready for you to come on, 4-5 week wait.

   Well hot weather is on the way, time to dig out the fans and make sure they work. And put the attic fans in the ceilings in kitchen and food barn.

   My days are getting better. The girls have been a great help to me. Thank you girls. The Lord always sends me people and blessing right on time. Thank you Lord.

   My power bill has dropped to it’s lowest in 10 years, dropped by $90, and I did two happy dances. :)  :)  I could not believe my eyes, I almost called the power company to see if it was a mistake.

  Hope you all have a great day.

Becky

 

Technorati Tags: Twisted Networks,Trojans,Farm life,making do,self sufficiency,chickens

  

A deep breathe-some tears-a lot of Prayers

Well it’s been a long week. This is what’s been going on:

*Took my truck in, it was not acting right. Well I now need a new engine. The engine will last 2 days – or 6 months or maybe a year. Cost if they can find a used engine $1,800.00. Ok Lord, let’s watch and see what You do. I need to sell the tractor to pay for the engine.

*The man came and put a new glow bar in my gas stove. While he was testing it, the safety switch would not shut off. Now I’m not to use the stove at all until it’s fixed, this Tuesday or Wednesday. Cost $250.00 for safety switch, glow bar was $166. The Lord sent someone to buy a hand gun I have which will pay the the safety switch. Thank you Lord. Now I’ll have a new stove, which will cost more than a brand new one.

I am glad I have a grill and a two eye gas stove outside.

*Well I had the stove man check the washer and dishwasher while he was here, ( so I would not have to pay another service call fee). The washer needs the arms that hold the tub in place. And the dish washer needs a sprayer bar. But they are cheap and he’ll bring them out with the safety switch. Thank you Lord. I’m taking very deep breaths with a few tears.

*Then I go out to mow the grass, I have 2 push mowers. To start, the best one, I had to turn on it’s side to get a string that was around the blade. Well when I set it back up right there was oil on the ground. So this house wife went and got a quart of oil to refill it. Would you not do the same? Well it took the whole quart. I started it up and mowed for about 10 minutes and the thing started smoking really bad. So I shut it off and called a guy. Did you know a push mower is Not supports to have a whole quart of oil? I didn’t. So he tells me to drain it. I ask, How? He said there’s a plug, or tip it again to drain it out. Well I looked and looked, could not find a plug, so I tipped it again. I got the right amount of oil in it. And mowed for an hour, and it stopped working. Ok Lord thank you I have another mower. So I go get it going, and mow another hour when it dies. Ok Lord, this yard really needs mowing. So inside I go to rest and cry a bit. I go back out and try that mower again, it starts. Thank you Lord. I mow another hour and it stops yet again. Then it dawns on me, the mower stops when it’s hot.  Sure enough I go back out when it cools off and it starts. Thank you Lord. Then I have to turn it off to take a phone call. I go back out and I don’t have the strength now to pull the cord to start it. Ok Lord, no more mowing today. Will this mower or mowers start again today? I am praying hard they will.

*The closet that holds the hot water heater has a hole in the floor to the ground. The main bathroom floor has dropped 2 inches. The landlords just left and they said they’d fix it tomorrow. Thank you Lord. While they were here they treated all the ant hills in the yard. Thank you Lord. They said all their rentals were having the same problems with ants.

Things I learned:

*I have also learned I do not have enough hands to do all that needs doing. Yard is clean – house a mess or yard a mess and house clean. I have to find the middle ground somewhere. Please Lord.

*A push mower does not need a whole quart of oil. And you need  good arm muscles to keep starting them.

*The Lord always sends people to help you in His time.

*Prayer is so much better than worrying. Worrying never fix a thing, while prayer fixes everything.

*Tears are good, they clean your eyes and heart.

*There is always something good to be found in the bad things that happen. In ALL things give thanks. I forgot to do this with the mowers and stove. And the Lord will still work everything out for my good.

Thank you Lord for Your mercy and grace.

Well let’s see what happens today on the farm.

Have a great day and God bless you all.

Becky

Blessed !!

   I sold both the bull and the small truck. Thank you Lord, and you all for your prayers. We'll be able to pay rent, power, and phone bills this month. With the bull it took 5 men (2 with lassos) and 5 cattle dogs and half an hour to load that crazy bull.

   I have had a few bad days this week.  One was really hard. But the last two days have been easier, thank you Lord. I'm still stepping slowly in this new life's path I'm on. And only sure of one thing: God never fails you and never leaves you alone.

   Social Security widow benefits start in May. So selling the bull and truck was a great, wonderful blessing. The Lord took care of us yet again. At times I question the Lord if I'm doing Him any good, leading any to Him. Well today I read on another forum, where I had help someone in their walk. I cried and thank the Lord. I know we don't always get to know when we help people, but God knew I really needed it.  I was close to giving up this blog. How could a simple, house wife, on the Internet help anyone? Well the Lord showed me.  He has shown me many different things lately. Things that have always been there but I never really saw them, or the way He wanted me to see them. Does that make any sense to you? I hope so. The Lord is still working on my wings, getting me ready to soar. (for those who missed this post: type "my wings" into the search box on the right, under photo, to read it at the end of that post).

   The girls are doing good. They too have hard days but we just start talking about Tommy and let the tears roll. One day at a time sweet Jesus is all we ask. And He answers.

   Well I have to take TommieLynn to an Easter egg hunt down the road, so I have to go.

May you all have a blessed and wonderful weekend.

Becky

  

 

What a Day? Mad Bull

   The man came and tried to get the bull yesterday morning, he had brought an other man with him. Two hours of chasing the bull and almost getting him in the trailer but bull broke through them. The bull ran around the yard then broke the gate to get back into his field. Tommy always went out and helped load cows, while I stayed in the house. Boy, I sure wish he was here again. The men left without the bull and said they'd be back last night.

   The man came back by his self. The bull went into the stall and we used a rope to hold the gate closed so he could not get out. The man had me hold the rope to keep a 500lb  mad bull in there. I had no gloves on and no where to wrap the rope around but my hands. Well the bull didn't want to stay in there, and he pushed and rammed the gate. I kept losing my grip on the rope, which allowed the gate to open some. After 10 minutes of fighting with this mad bull, some thing popped in my chest and by now I have rope burn and now a big deep cut on my finger where the rope was. My nerves are shot now, and I'm shaking all over. I told the man I could not hold any longer and let go. He was not happy but he was also smart enough not to open his mouth. He did say he would be back today with a gun that would put the bull to sleep while they loaded it. I said good and walked away.

   I had wondered if my decision was right to get rid of the bull was right, NOW I have no doubts, none! The sooner that bull leaves the happier I'll be.

   The guy brought my truck back last night. He said that with the big trucks, it had extra oil lines for pulling large loads. And since I would no longer be pulling loads, he did away with the lines and plugged the holes. Total cost $2.00. Thank you Lord. The guy has worked on Tommy's and my trucks for years.  So I know he has blessed me when he fixed my truck the last two times. Please pray the Lord would bless this guy.

   My farm will now just be chickens and gardens.   That decision has been made very very clear. No more cows, I can't handle them by my self.

   It has rained here on and off now for more than two weeks. So getting into the garden to work has not happened.

   Yesterday was an eye opening day, and I'm so glad it's over. I know the Lord walked closely with me yesterday. And for that I'm thankful.

   Life was so much easier when there was two of us making decisions.  Now every time I make one, I wondered if it's right.

   Becky

"Forgive always, and show unconditional love to everyone you meet."

Technorati Tags: beef cow,blessings,farming,self sufficiency

Not always easy being a women

Yesterday we got the first of Tommy’s ER and hospital bills — $5,246.25, $43.00, $220.00. That’s a lot of money, and I know that there are morning coming. Show us the way, Lord.

Tommy got up about 11 am. And I got ready to go to town. In town I got : 100lbs gas tank refilled $70 ( both were filled at the first of the month- one ran out in 7 days due to the cold weather, so I need another tank to make it the rest of the month.), picked up 4 of Tommy’s meds ( one was the cough pills and the pharmacist was a little up set that the new hospice was making us pay for breathing meds. So he dropped the price down to half - 60 pills- 15 days- $25. Thank you Lord. The other pill was for his sinus $11.52.); picked of meds for Tasha from our old drug store( she opened the bag when i got home and found on the bottle that they owed her 12 pills more, she was up set. Tommy and I told her that’s why we changed, it was costings we to much to go to town twice to get 1 whole med filled.) : at Family Dollar, I got 4- 2liters of sprite (which had a coupon saying “buy 3 sodas and oreo’s cookies and get $2.00 off.” you kids know my love for oreo’s, so I checked there price- $2.25. OK, I got my cookies for 25 cents, what a blessing and a treat.) : then went to the feed store and got 200 lbs of feed, ( the ladies working there know I buy seed potatoes this time every year, so they tell me they only have a few of my kind left and the next order they place the prices go up. So I paid for my feed and charged to my account 50lb bag of seed potatoes until the first of the month, the bag was $15.75, so at least I had one bag for now.) : At the thrift store I found 4 new looking bras for 25 cents each, 3- mine and 1 for Tommielynn: then picked up a few groceries.

When I got home, I called up the road to a friends house and asked if her husband could help me unload the 100lb tank off the truck. He came down and unloaded it for me. Another blessing.


Then while I was unloading feed and putting it up, a man (which was here days ago, wanting to buy my chickens, I said no then). While he asked me how much I wanted for my chickens. I told him again I was not selling my chickens. He said, well I talked to Tommy earlier today and he told me to come out this evening. ( Well Tommy had told me he talked to him while I was in town, and that he’d told him he’d have to talk to me about it. Tommy has always let me handle the buying and selling of farm things. Even if the older farmer men don’t like dealing with women that know what they are talking about. Some have just left the farm when Tommy tells them to talk to me.) Well back to this man, he then asks to buy my young roosters and again I tell him no. Then he asks to buy my yard wagon, no. Then he wants to buy my meat bull because he looks so good, NO. He said, you can’t take care of him with Tommy down. OK, now my blood is really starting to boil. As calmly as I could I said, I have been taking care of this farm and bull cows for many year now, and I’m the one that got that beef bull to look good. He just shook his head and started walking around the yard again. He came to the camper shell Tommy had made for the back of the big truck, and asked to buy it, NO> Then he wanted our blue small tractor/ mower, NO. He said, What are you going to do with it? Well I said my yard still needs to be mowed. He asked if I did it, to this he has gotten his first yes. Now he sees the big farm tractor and asks about it. I tell him it’s $2000 with everything. He asks how low I’ll go. i told him it was not leaving the yard for under $2000. He was not happy and thought a minute and said, You know that tractor will tip over easy with you driving it. I said no it would not because I didn’t drive it. So he says then let me have it for under $2000. My lady manners are starting to leave my body. I said no, it would sit under cover until someone had $2000. Then he walks right back to my young roosters and asks to buy them again as I don’t need 5 roosters– ANOTHER NO. I tell him Tommy’s up and watching TV, why not go in and say hi as you are his friend. He said , no I have to go. thank you Lord, he’s leaving. As he is getting in his car, he asks again to buy my silky chicken and buffs. I take a really deep breath and say no yet again.


I go into the house to tell Tommy. He just said I handle him well just like I always handle farm business with old men. I told Tommy I was so very close to losing it and so very mad. I asked him if I had a “dumb” sign on my chest. “No”, he said, “some old men are that way. And that they think you will sell things cheap now that they all know I’m dying.” I asked Tommy to pray for me to have wisdom to handle these men now and in the future. He said he would but I was doing a great job now. I don’t feel that way at all. I know I’m not the kind of women these old farmer men are used to, but I’m not dumb and stand my ground. Over the years now, a few have really gotten ticked off when I showed, I knew what I was talking about or how they were wrong about something they were selling, and me knowing the fair price. I have fought these kind of men for years now, but today’s takes the big prize. There really needs to be more women farmers. I’m praying this man does not come back — for his sake. Now I do have to give credit to a few old farmers, who once they found out I knew what I was talking about , we all became great friends.


The lady at the feed co-op said today that more and more young people, then ever before, are coming in to get garden supplies and asking about how to grow gardens.

Becky

Commenst:

Becky,I’ve been following your site for about six months now. I stumbled on it via Hillbilly Housewife. I,like many,have been gleaning how to stretch our dollars. Your honesty,creativity, passion,and willingness to share your life…joys, struggles, etc. have drawn me to make your site my home page….to learn from, and pray for you and your family daily.Many days I’m amazed (God is so Good!)at what you have shared and how it has ministered to me, in what I may be struggling with and learning about. Today was another of those days and I felt the need to let you know. It started today with your title “not always easy being a women”. Right now I’m doing a study on Esther by Beth Moore…it’s title “Esther: it’s tough being a woman. I felt lead to share some of it with you.1) its tought being a woman in another woman’s shadow (Esther 1). Without Vashti, we’d have no Esther, sometimes, in the hiddeness(of life struggles), God builds a woman she’d never otherwise become.2)it’s tough being a woman in a world where beauty is a treatment (Esther 2). Praise God for a King who gives a woman dignity instead of taking it. Our God views women with purity, not sensuality..Isaiah 61:103)it’s tough being a woman in a mean world (Esther3).Meaness always has a history (ie. the Amalekite and the jews) Meaness perceives a threat. (2Cor.10:12). Meaness catches like a virus (passed down and around -generation to generation).Dear One, He who delivered you from a Pharoah can deliver you from any Haman. Remember who you are.I have a good friend, who whenever I share the not so good things that take place, she says “That sucks!” She’s right some things just suck, but it’s how we handle those things that set us apart, and today you were set apart and handled things well.
Deborah Comment by Deborah February 19, 2009


Sounds like you handled things well! Bless your heart! Just hold your ground and they will soon learn you mean what you say! God Bless! Comment by Wendy February 19, 2009

Just Tommy and I this Weekend & Farm Update

Shawn and Cindy came and got TommieLynn for the weekend, Friday night. TommieLynn was overly happy to spend the weekend with her brother. Thank you Shawn and Cindy. Tasha went to Carl’s for most of the weekend. So it was just Tommy and I. Oh, what a treat. It has been many years since we have had a weekend alone together.

I took him out to eat Saturday night to his favorite restaurant to get his favorite meal. The restaurant had 4 men walking around singing to those of us eating. The restaurant had candles and flowers on the table. It was a wonderful evening, which we both really enjoyed. Thank you Lord, for blessing our evening and time together. I did have to give Tommy a dose of morphine while we were there but he said he had a great time with a smile. When we got home he did put on his oxygen and rested with a full belly and a smile in his face. His smile on his face so very much blessed me. I have found that the smaller things bless my heart so much more now than ever before. Thank you Lord again for a wonderful evening.

It is now time to cut down my chickens. We have 25+ chickens. And their feed bill is getting to high. People are no longer buying eggs. So I am giving away 2-3 flats of eggs a week. Don’t get me wrong, I do not mind giving eggs away, but their feed bill is about $30 a week. We no longer eat a lot of eggs a week, maybe 1-2 dozen. So we are down sizing the chickens. More than like, we will give the extra chickens away, to those who need them for food. Tommy is no longer able to butcher them,and I just can’t bring myself to do it. Now I could if I had too, but right now I don’t have too. Thank you Lord. So we will get the chickens down to 8-12 hens and a rooster, that way we will still be able to bless others with some eggs without over spending on feed. The beef cow is getting fatter, and will go into the freezer hopeful by late spring/early summer. And then all the pasture fences will come down.

Looking to spring: We will not have the big garden down in the field this year. The strawberry & tomato patch (were I have many raised beds and is fenced in) will be used again this year. And I have to fence in an area for potatoes and some corn, up closer to the house but away from the strawberry patch. So I have been scouting the yard for the right place to put it. It will not be real big as there is only 4 of us now. I will only plant 50 lbs. of potatoes instead of 200 lbs. We love potatoes. Our potatoes did not do very well last year, maybe a new spot will help. I have really missed our potatoes this winter. And just enough corn to eat fresh and a little to freeze, not 8 rows 150 ft. long. All other veg’s will go into the raised beds. So this will be our first year with a small garden.

The only seeds/plants I have to buy this spring are: potatoes, tomatoes, onions sets. I have enough seeds for the other things we grow for about 3 years. Which is a great blessing. We were blessed last year with a really big box of seed packets: veg’s. , flowers, herbs seeds. Yes, not all of them will come up due to being last years seeds, but more than 80% will. So I just replant seeds that don’t come up, and have done so for years. Every fall when our feed store marks that years seeds to half price, I buy the seeds I need to plant the following spring. I save money on seeds. As the seeds get older the percentage of the ones that will come up goes down some. I have planted some seeds that were over 3 years old, and had a good crop.

As the girls and I will be doing all the yard work this year, I am looking for ways to cut back on as much as I can. One things I am going to do to cut down on weed eating is: put straw/mulch/hay around things and places that usually need to be weed eat-ed. I can get all the straw and hay from our feed store for free:I pick up the broken bales off the ground, there is always a lot. TommieLynn has been begging to use the push mower, oh little does she know what she’s asking for. She starts this year, we’ll see now long she’ll want to mow.

We have friends coming in this coming weekend, Scott and Ann. Then the following week, Tommy’s sister, Linda, is coming for a visit. He has not seen her in 6+ years. They both are really looking forward to this visit.

Well I am going to finish enjoying my quiet weekend. Hope you all have a great week.

Becky

Weekend – It’s been good

Tommy has had a good weekend. He was up during the day and slept at nights. There was a few bouts with pain but the morphine helped. It was great having him up during the day.  And he really enjoyed being up with us.

Tasha and Carl, helped me to get some more things out of the shop. We have until the 15th to get everything else out, almost done, maybe just one more trip. Thank you Carl for your help.

It has been a long time since we have had an easy and good weekend. Thank you Lord. Tommy was able to help me fix things and he got some other things done.  Which made him feel useful.

The weather still does not know what it wants to do, one day cold and the next hot.

The girls are doing good. And Tasha’s belly is getting bigger.  The farm is doing good.

Thank you Lord for all your blessings, love, and mercy.

Becky

Technorati Tags: update,Tommy,family,blessings

An Update On Tommy---The Lord does it again

THURSDAY, FEBRUARY 05, 2009 09:30 PM, EST
Tommy is in the hospital tonight and should be home tomorrow. I had to call 911 at about 11am to come and get him. He was having a hard time breathing, his skin was more yellow, and his pulse keep going higher.
The doctor in ER said that Tommy’s blood enzyme (?Spell) were very low and his hemoglobin (?spell)was really low, which was making it hard for him to breath and making him feel like he was smothering. Tommy’s blood was not carrying oxygen like it was supports too. The doctor believes the cancer has gotten into the bone marrow and is eating the red cells. They are giving Tommy 2 pints of red blood cells tonight, which will help him feel better and breath easier. This is only a kind of quick fix and will only last a few weeks at most. Kind of like giving him morphine for pain. Tommy can chose to get more blood but we have no insurance and this time we with in through the ER. The ER doctor said that the 2 pints of red blood cells were very expensive. I don’t know what to do next? But tonight he is getting them. The rest is in the Lord’s hands.
Tommy was looking a little better when I left, but very tired. He was not as pale looking. Please keep praying for us. And thank you all for your prayers.
Becky
FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 06, 2009 09:15 AM, CST
mom called from hospital this morning dads hospice dropped his case last night we need hard fast pray now for a new hospice to pick up Tommy please pray hard
Tasha
SATURDAY, FEBRUARY 07, 2009 04:11 PM, EST
Thursday evening: After Tommy was settled into his room and I had talked to the nurses, we went home. By this time it was really dark, ( I can’t see to drive at night, I’m blinded by on coming head lights). So I followed Tasha in her car, which really helped. Well about a mile from the hospital, my windshield was dirty, so I sprayed it and turned on the wipers. Well being my brain was not working well- my windshield is now a sheet of ice, while driving down the road. I had to roll down the drivers window to see to pull over. Tasha came back to see why I had pulled over, I told her- she said mom it’s 10 degrees. I just cried as I scraped ice off the windshield. The Lord then got us home safe and sound. Thank you Lord. After we got home I called some family with the update on Tommy and thankfully they passed it on to others. I was so very tired both mind and body. I prayed all night: Lord, will you please send us a better hospice or give ours now a heart to help Tommy. Friday: I awoke praying the same prayer. Tommy called a little after 8am saying the doctor had been there and he was ready to go home. I started getting ready to go get him; and dread, worry, fear started to cover me and I started shaking. It all came on so fast and that to scared me. Instead of letting my mind have it’s way - I started saying the 23rd Psalm out loud then said 2 Timothy 1:7 “My God did not give me the spirit of fear: but of power, and of love and of a sound mind.” I kept repeating these two all the way to the hospital. It was a fight, and by the time I got to the hospital, I was calmed down and had peace. Thank you Lord.
I went in and talked to Tommy and then went to tell the nurses I was there. While I was packing up Tommy’s things, his room phone rung. I answered it. It was the hospices head RN, I told her I was going to call as soon as I got home. She said no need too, that they dropped/discarded Tommy’s case last night and we could not leave the hospital until we found another hospice to take up his care. I asked, Why? She said because I had took Tommy to an uncontracted hospital for treatment. I said he was having trouble breathing. She said, we are no longer his hospice and hung up.
I can honestly say, if I had not prayed all morning- I know I would have lost my mind with a nerves breakdown. Thank you Lord for preparing me. Now I’m in total shock!!Tommy saw my face turn white as I was hanging up, and started to ask me, but I just held up my hand for him to give me a minute. I took a few deep breaths and tried so hard to pray but worry and fear came in again fast. So I told Tommy everything. Then started making phone calls asking for fast prayer, as I just could not seem to get the prayers out at that moment. Then I called our family doctor( they had set us up with the first hospice) and told them what happened(they had told me to take Tommy fast to an ER yesterday), She said she would look into it and get back to me. Honestly, now I’m shaking and wrapped tight in fear and worry and my mind is on overload. I asked to talk to the head nurse to see about talking to the hospitals social worker, she said she’d send her to the room. So I go back to the room to wait. Tommy says he wants a candy bar, so off I go to get him one. While on my way back to the room a small voice says, ”You asked for a new hospice, but I’ll do it My way.” I started crying and asking for forgiveness for my lack of faith and for worrying. And an overwhelming peace filled me. Thank you Lord. I walked into Tommy’s room crying and he asked why. I told him of my prayer last night and this morning and our answer coming. He cried too. We both thank the Lord and took a few deep breaths. We both had to fight hard to keep fear and worry away and hang on tight to His words for a few hours. We kept talking about all the prayers He has answered over the years. Then the call came from our family doctor, they found us a new hospice who would pick up Tommy’s case. And would be coming to the hospital as soon as our doctor signed and faxed them the paper work. Tommy and I gave thanks again to the Lord. They came and we signed papers.
Tommy and I left the hospital about 3 pm. The new hospice nurse was at our house at 5 pm. She was wonderful, and said they would get Tommy’s pain under control ASP. Tasha came home while she was still here. I had sent her out for a fast food dinner. I was totally worn out with no strength left to make dinner. Thank you Tasha for running into town for me.
The nurse called me an hour and a half later: She said that so far with the information she was plugging in, they would cover his cancer, but not sure yet if they could cover his COPD breathing meds, but no matter what I could keep the oxygen machine. With a peaceful heart, I told her ,“to do what she could do and the Lord would see to the rest. If it turns out we have to buy his COPD meds and inhalers that the Lord would provide them or a way to get them.” She said, “ she agreed as she to has seen the Lord answer prayers and knows He takes care of His own.” Tommy’s and my bodies are worn out , but our spirits are joyful and peaceful.
Thank you Lord for walking us through yet another day and for blessing us so. And answering prayers in Your way and in Your time. Thank you for forgiving us of our weak faith and trust.
Today looking back I now see: the Lord prepared me for bad news ( hospice letting us go), reminding me He is still answering my prayers in His way and His time, walking with us in what felt like our darkest hours, strengthening our faith and trust in Him, renewing our hope in hospice people. Thank you Lord. But in order for us to grow in him, and our faith and trust to grow: we must go through trials, fears, unknowns, lonely times to be able to see His hands and love in it all. That’s were faith and trust become stronger with each trial we look back on. When going through trials we do not always feel Him near us and helping us- But He NEVER leaves us- not even when we don’t feel him. Thank you Lord for carrying my family through another trial. And please help us to always remember this trial and the work you did in it when the next trial comes.
Saturday: Tommy had some pain last night but morphine stop it. The new hospice nurse was out this morning. She is going to be asking the new hospice doctor Monday morning for: morphine sulfate MSER 100 mg (she said if by second dose it’s not working they will up it); a new sleeping pill, a much stronger anti- inflammatory, and a few other things. What a great blessing not having to wait a week plus for something to work and go up on dose.
Tommy had corn beef hash and eggs to eat. Then watched some Netflix's. And is now going out on the porch to get some vitamin D with it 70 it’s nice and warm for him.
I can’t thank you all enough for all your prayers, Thank you.
God Bless you all,
Becky

Comments:

1. Becky,
   I have been reading your posts for several months. You are the reason I started my food stock pile. You gave me a place to start. I am thankful for your guidance. You seem to be such a hard worker and I admire you for holding your family together. I know the Lord must have blessings for you a plenty. I was so happy to read that Tommy got a new hospice. Thank you Lord!!! I will continue to pray for you, Tommy and your family. I live by the saying, “when one door closes another one opens! The old hospice door closed, but another one opened! Wonderful. Comment by Holli February 7, 2009

2. I am so sorry you have to go through all this. I am glad though that you love the Lord. I always wonder how people cope who do not know the Lord. Its true we grow the most when times are toughest. I will pray for you and Tommy and your family every time I think of you. It was good to read what you wrote about praying and then thanking God. Sometimes we pray for help but forget the give thanks when we get it. take care blessings debbieo Comment by Debbieo February 7, 2009

3. Becky,
   My wife and i have read you blog for a while and found it very inspiring that someone with so little has been able to accomplish so much. You are really amazing. I recently had a close brush with death and was convinced i only had a short time left and i was so scared and kept thinking “why me?”. But after a while i started to realize that I have to just let go and have complete faith that everything happens for a reason and that pertains to both the good and the bad. Often times we are not meant to understand why, but we must faith. We are all going to depart this earth eventually but its just a matter of how and when. But its up to us to decide what we will do with the time that we have been given and always remember that death is not the end but is only the beginning. Best WIshes, Maximus Comment by Maximus February 9, 2009

4. Hi,there is some information available at http://ncrf.org/ that you might find helpful. Best wishes to you. Comment by hello February 11, 2009

5. Thank you all for your comments and prayers. And thank you for stopping in here. Have a great day.I am blessed to have you all.Becky
   Comment by Becky February 15, 2009

6. God has answered your prayers. You are no longer stuck with a second rate hospice who seems to have little to no compassion for your husband. Just watch God work for you. As awful as all this is, Jesus is sustaining you. Things will get better. Comment by terilyn February 20, 2009

7. God bless and keep you Becky and your dear Tommy and family.I am meeting you for the 1st time tonight and so happy to know you and am inspired by your love of the Lord, your family, and your kindness to others. I am deeply touchedby your gratefulness, kindness, and humble simple way.Thank you for your good advice-I’m taking it! I’m the mom of 4 and grandma of 1 so far. My family (kids are 21-30) doesn’t know that I have been stockpiling food and necessary stuff for months now. They aren’t watching the horizon. So I pray much for them by God’s grace, and like you, place my trust in Him. Becky, I will pray for you and your husband and family. Much love and prayer in Him,stephanie
   Comment by Stephie February 21, 2009

This & That 1/29/09

I have not had a lot to say. ( alright now, no laughing) And I’m not sure what else needs to be posted on stocking foods and getting ready for the hard times ahead. I have been doing a lot of reading on the Internet, and checking on everyone. This site is still showing a lot of hits on stocking up and canning potatoes, etc.
I’m not liking what I hear on the News: more job loses, more people losing their homes, more companies lay off and closing down, and now the recall on peanut products. This mess will not be leaving us any time soon. So I’ll continue to keep a watch on our money, keep stocking, and keep looking for more ways to save money. And I’ll post any new finds I find out about.
Here we have seen good days and bad days but/and overly blessed. But we are still kicking hard. And we are thankful for grace and mercy for each day. This world is not our home. Tommy has good and bad days. And still loves his mp3 player. While he listened to it this morning, he found a loving message from Tommielynn. I did not even know she put it on there. But it brought a wonderful smile to Tommy’s face.
Tommielynn has stayed up late with Tommy a few nights, watching and helping him. I was informed by her that I needed my sleep and it was her alone time with her daddy. She has been a great help to me in helping with Tommy’s care. I am so very blessed to have a wonderful family.
With the weather not being the greatest(snow, rain), I admit I’ve been using the dryer for the clothes. In a way it’s been nice using it. (It does save some time, but also uses more power). Well I’ll use it as a treat for me. And it really only took the power bill up about $20, not bad for using it 4-5 times a week for about a month. This last week’s weather has been really different: one day is shorts, and the next layered clothes. No wonder I can’t get rid of this head cold.
Well I hope you all have a great day.
Becky

Update and My Wings

TJ, Tex and Janet came up this past weekend. They got the tools out of the shop, so we can close it and stop paying rent there. They also got two large buffets out of our living room. This really open it up. And will allow Tommy to use his walker easier now. Now I have to find a place for everything that was in them. I still have some boxes in the floor. TJ put a part on the truck. We all worked hard this past weekend. Thank you all again for everything you did and all your help.
I sold the milk cow this past Tuesday, a mixed blessing. No more milking but also no more milk. TommieLynn is so very happy to be done with milking. I froze and canned some milk yesterday. And I thought I’d get to sleep in Wednesday morning, well only until 7:30 am as the dogs woke me up wanting out, oh well. And this morning, I am up at 4 am coughing really hard, but I will let the dogs out and go back to bed. I’m still fighting this yuck in my chest, and I’m almost done with round two of antibiotics and on my 5th bag of Halls cough drops, and week 5 of this. I have tried everything under the sun, even herbs. How long can this last???
It rained really hard yesterday and is to do the same today. We had rivers going through the fields and in the yard. The poor chickens looked so funny, them being all wet and muddy. Tommy told me to tie a rope to the truck and tied it to the porch. It was bad, we have not had that much rain in years. Yes, here we really needed it but didn’t want it all in one day.
A friend, Jenny, said the Lord was giving me my wings, when I talked to her last week. To be honest it felt like He was cutting my wings, with all the changes. Jenny said He was giving me my wings to fly. And at the time (last week) I felt grounded, very grounded. I didn’t feel like flying, and did not see it that way. And this really bothered me. Why I could not see what someone else saw. So the more I thought about it, the clearer it became. The things being taken away, the changes being made, were to lighten my load so I could fly. A bird can’t fly when it’s loaded down with things it really does not need. I see it like a bird who’s wing was broke, and it could not fly for a while, but still remembers flying. And has to wait for the wing to heal, and then relearn to fly again. Or like the fighting roosters tied to a little house, they can move some but can’t fly very high or far. I have always like the song, “ On the Wings of a Snow White Dove”, so Tommy has brought me doves over the years. And as I looked around my house at all the doves, I remembered, He sends His love on the wings of a dove. Now I see that the Lord is teaching me to fly again, and like the birds learning to fly again, it’s hard work and it hurts. And some birds don’t want to leave what they have known, being grounded by string or broken wing or just caged. They have forgotten what it is like to fly. I too, have forgotten what it’s like to fly, but I am remembering now. I want to fly again. I have allowed things and people to ground/ cage me. But my wings are healing and the door is opening, freedom is in the air. And just like the birds, I too, will fly through the storms of life or soar above them. I want others to see His love on my wings again, I want to fly for Him. To bad, I did not see all this sooner, so as not to fight it so hard. But I am thankful the Lord did not give up on me and keep at me to fly again. Is the Lord working on your wings?? Are you grounded or caged? Has something in life broken one of your wings? The Lord is waiting for you to fly again, He’s waiting to heal you, too.
Come fly with me.
Becky

Comments:

1. Becky, As always, you are an inspiration.  ) What beautiful insight into our growth process. May God continue to bless you as you stretch your wings and fly once again. In Him, Stacie  Comment by arksoaper | January 7, 2009 |

2. Thank you for sharing. Sometimes I forget the Lord has to prune us and our lives so that we can grow closer to Him. Hope you are feeling better soon. Comment by Country Lady | January 8, 2009 |

3. Nice post Becky… hoping your changes bring even bigger and better changes in your life.. take care and know that God is always near especially at times like these… Janine Comment by Janine | January 11, 2009 |

4. Why can’t they do a fentanyl (spelling) pump implant? That way your hubby can push the button for extra relief when needed, yet not use as much when not needed. It is very common for people with terminal pain to have the wire implanted for the pain pump on demand. It’s not exactly important to worry about “hooking” someone on drugs when the case is terminal. Pain relief is more important than any thing else. You really have a crappy hospice. I am so very sorry you are going through this with such poor support there. Is there anyway at all you could have access to a different doctor or program?
   I will pray for your husband and your family. Comment by teri | January 12, 2009 |

5. And just like the birds, I too, will fly through the storms of life or soar above them. Your post was very moving for me. My family and I have had to learn to fly through the storms and soar above them!!!! I am new to this web site. I do understand the terrible dreaded “C” word. My husband was diagnosed with cancer last year. God was good. We had a growth - tumor removed from behind his left ear in May’08. He went back a week later to have the drain tube removed only to be told the tumor was cancer; however there were parts left behind. The doctors had to make a treatment plan for him. They told us because he was young and a strong healthy man that he could handle the sink being thrown at him. We went through our chemo and our radiation and now dealing with some hearing loss and vertigo - we are blessed that he is getting great results from his 3 month follow ups. As a spouse watching her husband go through all of it, it is very traumatic. You want to take their pain - their sickness away and all one can do is hold their hand or head through the rough times. During the good times, we made them our best. We have a small child - 5 yrs old. He still worries that Daddy will go to heaven. We are constantly reassuring him that Daddy is ok.  My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. Comment by Tara | January 29, 2009 |

6. Tara, I will keep your family in my prayers. As I know first hand what everyone is going through. Remember to take care of your self too. Becky Comment by Becky | January 31, 2009 |

Hands have been full But I'm still blessed

Life has been full lately. Tommy has been having a hard time with pain: Hopefully this is straighten out now. I have been sick for 3 weeks now, and last Thursday I went and got an antibiotic.  And I have been doing only the "have to" chores. The farm is doing good. The girls are fine. The weather does not know what it wants to do- one day cold, next day warm. 

I sure have miss you all. Hopefully I can get back here now and read up on what everyone has been up too. Hope you all had a Merry Christmas. Our Christmas was good. Tommy got a tractor book, he has wanted for a while. TommieLynn got a small MP3 player, which she loves. We had a quiet day.

Tommy is still enjoying Netflix. He said last night that he finally figured out the remote control.  And loves the fact he no longer has to watch commercials.

Scott and Ann came up again for a few days. And they helped out around here. Thank you both very much for your help. And for putting a smile on Tommy's face.

This is from Caring Bridge site this morning.

Good Morning everyone,

I'm sorry it's been so long but it's been a long week. OK here goes:

Friday 19, Three people came out from hospice and talked to Tommy and I for about an hour. They said they would see about a break through med.

Saturday 20, Tommy woke up at 6 am having a hard time breathing. So we moved the oxygen machine into the bedroom. (he now uses the oxygen nightly)He is still hurting but not as bad as before.

Sunday 21, My grandmother died this evening.

Monday 22, At 12:20 am Tommy fell and I woke to a crashing sound. He's not hurt. At 11am, Tommy falls again trying to pick up clothes off the floor. He's not hurt. Then Dr. Burke calls me: and says he has made a mistake and can not take Tommy's case and will give it back to the hospice doctor. And he is really sorry. (now we are not sure if the hospice doctor will take Tommy back.) Then my uncle calls and says my cousin has been in a bad car wreck. Her 3 little girls only had some stitches and are OK. But she was throw from the car. The doctors have put her into a coma as all her face bones are broke and her skull is cracked. Then I go to town to find a walker for Tommy. And while I'm gone he falls again, not hurt. Our pastor bring us gifts from the church and has prayer with us. Very long day, and I'm still fighting this cold/ sinus infection.

Tuesday 23, The hospice nurse came out to get Tommy's vitals and stresses again about the meds and his BP. About 15 minutes after she leaves, a DSS Social Worker (Social Services)came to our door.(OK Lord I'm only one person.) First thing she say to me,"I told my boss before I even left the office that these charges would be unfounded. But by law I have to come out." She said she was sorry about Tommy's cancer and would pray for him and us. And she was really sorry to bother us, but she had to come out. She said the charges were unfounded and wish us a Merry Christmas and left. ( please say a prayer for the person who called them). At 4:30pm the hospice nurse called and Dr. Witt is back on the case and has ordered the drop Morphine immediate release, to be taken .25-.5 ml every 2 hours (before when he had the morphine it was .5-1 ml every hour). But we are very thankful to have it now.

Wednesday 24, Tommy got up really tired and with a little pain. Miss Jenny sent us a lot (I mean a lot) of apples and oranges, and so homemade clothes soap. Tommy just grinned from ear to ear when he seen all the bags of fruit. Thank you very much, Miss Jenny. Please give the boys a hug and kiss from us. This was kind of a very lazy day.

Thursday 25, I was up most of the night coughing which had Tommy up most of the night. Tommy had went out to check something on the truck, and while coming back up the stairs, his knees went weak, he fell to his knees, not hurt. I was there and helped him back up, then made him promise not to go back down without me, he said OK. So TJ and Tex when you get here I need you all to put a hand rail at the back steps, please. Another church brought us 3 Christmas dinners plates and a fruit basket this evening.

Tommy ate more dinner tonight, than he has eaten in a long time. I guess because it was his favorite: fried Chicken and liver, French fries and corn. It was so good to see him eat so much.

Friday 26, Then this morning when I woke up to give Tommy his 4 am pills, He said I already took them at 2 am. I said no you can't do that, he just said sorry. Well at his 6 am pills, I noticed not all the pills were in the slot. So I asked him, he said some fell into the sink at 2 am. One of which was the 40mg pain pill that he can't get again until 10am. So I am praying that his pain will be low until then. I can't give him another 40mg, as the hospice keeps a count of all the pills, every time they come out. and now I'll have to hide the pills from him.

It's been a very long, hard week. But by God's grace and mercy, we have made it through. He even threw in blessings along the way to bless us. Thank you Lord for watching out for us yet again. Thank you all for your prayers. Hope you all had a Merry Christmas.

This has been a very long, hard year for my family. But thank you Lord, you have seen us through it each step of the way, and have poured Your blessings out on us. Thank you Lord for all our friends and family, and all my Internet sisters who have become great friends to me.  Lord, please bless them all.

Becky

Comments:

1. You and your family are in my prayers! Comment by Wendy | December 27, 2008 |

2. Have you considered that a “disgruntled” hospice worker turned your family into DSS? From reading your posts, I am unsure if you are able to afford a lawyer, but it sounds like you need one. If your husband is not getting adequate care and pain management, it is malpractice. He should get adequate care regardless of whether you are fully insured or simply on Medicaid. I would certainly file a complaint with DSS about the false report that was turned in on your family. False reporting is a felony, and the person responsible needs to be prosecuted. I am so sorry your husband is so very ill. Comment by teri | December 27, 2008 |

The Surprise Guest and Family

Family left this morning, and Tommy is taking a nap. He did pretty good and he took a nap Saturday. When he need to rest he did. There was a few times he was nausea but did not get sick. Over all it was a wonderful weekend.

Here are some photos of our weekend:

This is Tommy's surprise guest, Karen, his daughter who he has not seen in years. He had no idea she was coming. When she walked into the house, his mouth hit the floor. Then came the biggest smile ever. Thank you, Karen.

 

Tommy and Karen (daughter)

Saturday morning breakfast

TJ (son)  and Tommy cooking breakfast.

Tommy and TJ

Becky, Tommy, Brenda (TJ's mom and Tommy's ex-wife)

And as always out with the guns again. TJ and Tommielynn

Brenda taking a rest.

Tasha and Carl (her boyfriend, baby's father)

Tommy, Karen, TJ

Tasha, Karen, Becky

Brenda cleaning the kitchen while everyone else is resting in the living room. I told Tommielynn to take her photo so I could show everyone my slaved labor for the weekend.  LOL  Thank you Brenda for all your help.

We all had a great weekend. Thank you very much TJ, Brenda, and Karen for coming and put so many smiles on Tommy's face and some much laughter in the air. Thank you all to for all the blessings.

Have a great day, I am off for a nap.  Becky

Comments:

1. That is so nice you guys had such a nice weekend together as a family. Wishing you the best this Thanksgiving. Take care! Comment by Janine | November 23, 2008 |

2. Tommy & Becky…it was great to see Tommy smile as family usually cures our ailments…….I hope you guys have a great Thanksgiving…we’ll be eating the big bird here in Hawaii also. Comment by Rick Jordan | November 24, 2008 | 

3. Love the pictures! It looks like you all have a great dynamic and get along so good. What a wonderful blessing. Comment by D. | November 24, 2008 |

 

What’s going on here? 11/17/08

Here it was 28 this morning with frost. It’s been chilly here lately. I guess winter is here. I have made my first pair of baby socks, they are so little and cute. And I just started Tommielynn’s socks. Tommielynn is still trying to fight off a cold/sinus. She’s doing pretty good. She has made a new friend up the road, and has been spending some time up there with her. Which I think is great, as it gets her out of the house for a while. Someone has to be here with Tommy at all times (due to having to take pills around the clock and him being weak), which means when I have to run to town get his meds, etc: Tommielynn has to stay here with Tommy. She does not get out as much as before. Tasha tries to get her out of the house as much as she can, too. Thank you Lord for sending her a new friend.
Tommy has been sleeping a lot lately. But his pain is better and he’s not getting sick any more, but has had nausea. He says he’s really tired and weak and tired of both. He has been eating a lot of apples and oranges as he says they taste so good. At this point, I’ll give him anything he wants to eat. He does eat a little dinner but not much.
I have been taking naps and rest when I can. Sorry to say, I only do what has to been done in the house and on the farm. My house is a mess. But trying to do it all was not working well. So now I do what I can, and the rest is on hold until I get time. So when you come over just don’t look around to much. When Tommy’s up, I do nothing but spend time with him. I still have not gotten the bunk bed set put together or the sewing room done and ready for my daughter and company.
So those of you out there trying to be a super mom/wife, you had better slow down, and enjoy life more, one day at a time. Because the days and time pass to fast. I have learned this lesson the hard way. I can’t do it all.( boy, is that hard to say) I do what I can, and leave the rest to the Lord. Spotless house or time with my family and rest for me??? I guess I’m as hard headed as Tommy. (don’t tell him I said that or I’ll never hear the end of it.)
Thank you Melaine and girls for the wonderful dinner brought last night, and the smile you put of Tommy’s face with your hugs and smiles. And thank you for your prayers. Melaine told Tommy that her children pray nightly for him, hearing that really blessed us. Melaine, thank you very much for your friendship. I pray that God would bless your family to overflowing and fill you all with His peace.
Thank you all who have signed the guestbook at Caring Bridge Site for Tommy, as your comments have blessed Tommy and myself. Knowing so many of you really care and are praying for us is a wonderful blessing to us. Thank you for taking the time to pray for us and leave your comments saying so. May God bless you all to overflowing.
Very humbled and blessed,
Becky

Thank you for recipes and prayers

Thank you all for the recipes. Yes, I do have a crock pot. I have printed off the recipes you left and Tommielynn is getting to pick out which one’s she wants for dinner, which she loves. They all sound so good. Thank you again.
Yesterday and last night were bad for Tommy. I updated Caring Bridge last night and will update it nightly now. Tommielynn finally accepted the fact that her dad is dying. She broke down last night. We have told her everything, every step of the way. Please say a prayer for her.
Thank you all for your prayers as they get us from day to day. And all your wonderful comments really touch my heart. To know some many people care and are praying for us is a wonderful feeling. Thank you all again. May God bless you all to overflowing.
Very thankful and humbled,
Becky

October 31, 2008 - Posted by Becky Prayer, Tommy, blessings, recipes, thank you blessings, Prayer, recipes, thank you 7 Comments

7 Comments »
Here are a couple easy and good recipes. I normally make the pie crust for the Chicken Pot Pie but the ones in the store freeze well and taste good. You could even use a can of chicken if you wanted to make it very easy. The Taco Skillet is easy enough for your daughter to make. My husband does not like casseroles but enjoys this one.
As I was reading your update on Tommy I thought of this U-Tube I saw this week and hoped it would encourage you.The Lord is ever-present and promises that His grace is enough. I am praying for you and your family.http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C0r_FbARIn8&NR=1*~*~*
Chicken Pot Pie
1 can cream of potato soup1 can cream of celery soup16 oz. Veg-all2 c. cooked diced chicken1/2 c. milk1/4 tsp. thyme or less1/2 tsp. pepper (make sure it’s not the coarse pepper or use less)Put inbetween 2 crusts and cook until crust browns. Somewhere between 30-45 minutes at 375-400.*~*~*~Taco Skillet
My husband doesn’t care for many casserole dishes but really liked this one when my daughter in love made it.
1 pound ground beef1 can tomato soup (10 3/4 oz)1 cup salsa1/2 cup water8 6″ corn tortillas cut in 1″ pieces1 cup shredded cheddar cheese
Brown beef in skillet, drain grease. Add soup, salsa, water, tortillas & 1/2 of the cheese. Heat to a boil. Cover and cook on low 5 minutes. Top with remaining cheese.
Comment by Georgene October 31, 2008

Sending more hugs & prayers!
Comment by Pam's Pride October 31, 2008

Hi again,
I just ran across this video that I know will minister to you. He talks about his diagnosis of prostrate cancer and how God used the gospel to minister to His heart. Click on the link below.
http://www.godtube.com/view_video.php?viewkey=edf1eb4e6e52a37ea7bc&msg=Your%20email%20has%20been%20successfully%20sent%20to%20your%20friend.
Comment by Georgene October 31, 2008

We are lifting Tommy, you, and your family up in prayer, Becky. May God comfort you all, strengthen you, and give you peace that passes all understanding. Wish we lived close enough that I could bring supper to you. Sending you lots of love and hugs.
Stacie
Comment by arksoaper October 31, 2008

Becky, I am praying for You,Tommy and Tommielynn. I agree with Stacie, I wish we lived close enough that I could bring you supper. God has blessed you with remarkable courage and strength. He has given you the knowledge and ability to not only take care of your family but to also teach us how to take care of our families. And you are doing this while you are dealing with your husband’s illness! May God give you and your family rest and comfort.God Bless!Jackie
Comment by Jackie October 31, 2008

Oh Becky, my heart goes out to you and yours. I can’t imagine the feelings you must all have right now, but you are on my mind and in my prayers. I know there are alot of ladies in the blogging world who feel the same about you. We may not all know each other in real life ~ but your blogging sisters have your back! Lol…
Lots of prayers for you my friend.
Comment by D. November 2, 2008

Becky,Here is a link that I thought you and Tommy would find comforting…http://danledford.blogspot.com/
You remain in my prayers.
Linda J.
Comment by http://valleyvisions.blogspot November 3, 2008

My time here

It has been a rough few weeks here. Tommy has not been doing good. Hospice is now coming out twice a week. Please keep praying for him. And thank you for all the prayers that are going up now.

Ok, as for my time here writing post. I really enjoy all of you and writing posts. But I need to send as much time with Tommy as I can, taking care of him, etc. I will still be writing posts but I'm not sure now often. I will be checking in here as often as I can to answer your questions and writing posts. But now, it might take me a few days to do that. If you have not heard from me in a while, you can check here: Updates on Tommy’s Health. This is were I keep everyone up to date on Tommy's health. I will post there more than here. As we have family and friends all over the USA and Canada. I hope you all will understand.

Wednesday, I made two batch of homemade ice cream for Tommy. It's one of the few things he can keep down. And Tommielynn loves it too.

A friend, Beth, brought us two dinners yesterday. Oh what a great blessing. By dinner time I'm worn out. Poor Tommielynn has had cereal or bag noodles a few times these past few weeks. She was so thankful for the dinners, and Beth became her best friend when one of those dinners was chicken.

I have been (when Tommy is sleeping) redoing the sewing room. I have too rearrange it. So as to get the bunk bed set put in there. There is a twin top and a full bottom. Shawn, my son, is supports to come by soon and help me put it together. We will being having family and friends coming in, who need a place to sleep. With this set more people can stay here.

With the donations given here, we have been able to get the heater tanks refilled, and more. They have been such a wonderful blessing. Thank you again to all who gave; and those that could not give, thank you for your prayers. With out your prayers I/we would never make it through all of this. But with your prayers and by God's grace, we are making it, one day at a time.

With this blog, God has brought such wonderful people into our lives, oh what a great blessing. And here I thought I was writing to help others, when really you all were/are helping me. Thank you.

God Bless you all, Becky   Becky's Farm Life

Comments:

1. Becky -  Sending prayers and warm hugs your way… Comment by Linda | October 25, 2008 |

2. Hugs & prayers! Comment by Pam's Pride | October 25, 2008 |

3. We continue to pray, Becky. Your family needs you right now. You’ve been a huge blessing to so many, and I pray the Lord will grant you strength and peace through this time. Please know you are thought of daily. love in Christ, Stacie Comment by arksoaper | October 25, 2008 |

4. My thoughts and prayers are with you! You are doing what is right and biblical by putting your husband first. God bless you and give you His strength! Comment by Georgene | October 25, 2008 |

5. Thank you all for your prayers. Becky  Comment by jordansfarm | October 28, 2008 |

This and That on the Farm - 9/24

This comment was left on " I have a Friend" and it's great and I wanted everyone to see it. Thank you Linda J.

“…if all things are in His hand, if the very hairs of our head are numbered; if every event, great and small, is under the direction of His Providence and purpose; and if He has a wise, holy and gracious end in view, to which everything that happens is subordinate and subservient;–then we have nothing to do, but with patience and humility to follow as He leads, and cheerfully to expect a happy issue….How happy are they who can resign all to Him, see His hand in every dispensation, and believe that He chooses better for them than they possibly could for themselves!” ~John Newton, who wrote the hymn, “Amazing Grace”

A friend of ours let us borrow his living weed eater, goat. We are trying to clear out an area, so the cows can have a little more room. This area used to be the goat pen,  then was a pig pen. Well, at about dusk the goat was running around the yard.  Our friend had always keep him on a chain and just moved him around as needed. So the goat does not really like people, he runs from them. Yet, all my animals run to me, which makes catching them so easy, except it gets a little hairy when you have a 900 lb.+ cow coming at you. OK, back to this goat on the run. He had broke his collar, no fixing it. We got him , and used a rope to hold him. While
I tried to find another collar. Ok, I live on a farm and have animal bottles of all sizes and shapes, and I thought every thing needed to run a farm.

But there was no collar on the farm. I had think of something as the goat would go through the fence with the cows in it, and it's getting dark. Here is what I did, and goat was not to happy. I found a calf halter and put in on him. And yes it was big on him, Tommy had to cut another hole in it to get it as tight as we could. And let me tell you that goats can dance. He tried for over an hour to get it off.

Now for gas here. A friend called yesterday and said that our area was very low, or out of gas. One gas tanker was splitting the gas between 4 stations. For about 40 miles around us there is no gas. They are not sure when it'll come in. When Tommy came home Monday, he said the gas station , less than a mile from home was out of gas, and the next station 6 miles up the road had a 10 gallon limit. So he filled up the truck. Which now I am thankful he did. With the new little truck, we can go to town 3 1/2 times in gas for what we only got 1 trip with the other truck. Thank you Lord. And thank you Lord the worry and fear bug had no hold this time, I had Your peace! And last nights News was not much better, but I got my peace.

I am having to get more creative. Here are some more of my new ways of saving money:

1. I use freezer bags, but have not been washing them out and reusing them. ( don't reuse the ones that have held meat in them. I use freezer paper for my meats.) But now I'm washing them out. I have seen those little bag drier stands, costing about $20+. I will not pay that. So at the thrift store I found a small set of Tinker toys for a $.25, and got them. And made my own bag drier and it sits on top of the drier. I'll post a photo in a day or two.
2. The AC was turned off in the food barn. And the windows were opened and a fan turned on. This will really drop the bill.
3. I willing be making my own clothes soap this week.( will post photos later).
4. Will start back making our own bread as a store loaf here is over $2.50.
5. Even my 11 yr old daughter is getting creative, she has 3-4 new grilled cheese ways.
6. Tommy is getting up some fire wood. Not knowing what this winter will bring, we are preparing for the worse and praying for the best. We do not have a wood heater but I will be able to cook. The cooking/heating gas has already gone way up and winter is not here yet.
7. I am making everyone wool house socks. Our floors are so cold in the winter. And the heat this year will be keep on low. I guess I will not be able to wear shorts in the house this winter. And I'm looking into getting my daughter sweat suits to wear to bed this winter, as she does not like to cover up or likes to kick them off.
8. Water- We have a 425 gallon tank in our back yard. ( I need to change the water below winter) You can save any bottles you have and fill with water. The bottles that had soaps of some kind in it, fill with water, they can be used to wash dishes, hands, etc. Other bottles for drinking/ cooking water. And the bottles can be stuck anywhere it does not freeze. Fill bottles almost full and let freeze, to put in coolers for when power out.

We were blessed this week, when a family up the road was moving out. Tommy trade a few ladders, transit, air compressor for a 12' X 16' building. They could not move it on the highway, but can be moved to our house. It is dried in, has a roof, a small loft in it, cedar siding almost done on the outside. It is so nice, looks like a little cabin. Well Tommy said I could have it. He had a  trailer frame  here in which to make me one, but this one is so close to done and the trade was good for both of us. The family could not take it, but needed the tools. The Lord is so good. It will be a sewing/ guest house. I can't wait to get it here so as I can fix it up the way I want. You see, we rent so I can't fix up much here. But the new little house is mine, oh what fun I am going to have. We'll put the bunk bed set we just got ( twin on top and full on bottom, which slides up to make like a couch.) The loft will be great for all the kids to sleep. They are pulling it down here this coming Saturday.

I have to go to town today to get food and feed. Boy, I sure hate going to town. I don't need much, but I really need the animal feed. So I'll get the few other things I can't make. Like bath paper, sugar, oil, goat collar. I have been reading others post about the prices of everything going up, so I'm glad my list is short. Anyone know how to make bath paper? I'm willing to try it.

Well I better get going and see what great deals can be found in town today.

May you all have a blessed day, Becky

Technorati Tags: blessings,creativity,farming,food prices,gas prices,ideas,making do,recession,saving money,self sufficiency,winter

Comments:

here is a good tutorial on making your own flannel bath tissue. http://walkslowlylivewildly.com/?s=bath+tissue  Comment by Caroline | September 24, 2008 |

It looks like you already got a good link. I was going to suggest the same thing….taking receiving blankets or fleece and cutting them to size and then surge ring the edges. I have asked my DH about doing this and he is not keen on the idea to say the least….but he did like my napkins (I posted a picture on my blog. Thanks for the idea!) I do like the idea of everyone having their own color scheme though!  http://pamspride.blogspot.com/2008/08/napkins.html  Comment by Pamspride | September 24, 2008 |

Becky - If you are getting sweats for your daughter to sleep in, consider getting her a hooded sweatshirt. The difference having her head and neck covered will make is enormous. I have a hooded sweatshirt that I got at the end of season a few years back. I found it in the young men’s department, some sports team that had played particularly badly and was no longer popular was on the front. They were practically giving them away as no teen male would be caught dead wearing that team’s logo, lol. I didn’t care what it looked like, as long as it was warm. I wear it over my flannel jammies. It is so nice and warm!  I am so happy for you trading your unused tools for a sewing/guest room that you will get TONS of use out of! Smart lady! Sorry to hear you are still having gas problems in your area. I have REALLY been trying to conserve as my car only gets 15 mpg. I have cut my driving so that I am now getting two full weeks out of a tank of gas. Thank you Lord, the cost to refill weekly was really hurting! I have been trying to follow your lead and prepare for the winter and hard times to come. I was so proud of myself when this past week or two I took a free towel and cut it down into six much needed dishrags. I am finding ways to substitute or stretch all over my home! Thank you. You are truly an inspiration!!! Linda  Comment by Linda | September 24, 2008 |

1. Thank you for sharing that quote at the top. I really needed that tonight. I may copy it and print it out. Gas is still in shortage here too. Makes us nervous. We will not be turning the heat up much this winter either. And from what I’ve heard, everyone is expecting this to be a hard winter weather-wise. There is much to plan for. Comment by D. | September 24, 2008 |

2. Caroline,  Thank you so much for the link.

3. Pamspride, When clicking on your name, we can not get to your blog. Would you copy and paste it in a comment? I would really like to see your napkins. And my hubby is not much for the idea of flannel bath tissue, but I am doing everything to prepare for the long winter ahead. We might not need them, but it’s good to have on hand if needed. Only the Lord knows what it will bring.

   Linda,
   My daughter does not like the hooded ones. She’ll wear her knitted wool hat out to help with chores.At town yesterday, I passed more than 10 gas stations, all with the pumps covered, no gas. Well I’m set to stay home now for about two weeks.
   I am proud of you too, homemade dish rags, great.
   And your welcome, I am just wanting to share what I know, to help others along the way.

   D.,
   Was is not great. I too, am printing it out.And yes, there is a hard, long winter coming. All the fruit and nut trees were overflowing this year. God’s way of helping wild life prepare. By watching the animals, we can get a good idea of whats to come. My cows are starting to get their winter coat. And yes, we all have a lot to plan for, for this winter. Thank you all, Becky  Comment by jordansfarm | September 25, 2008 |

4. Becky, I’m so excited to find your blog. I’ve just started reading through and I can’t wait to learn more. We’re fighting hard to keep our cars gassed up, too. The last fill up for my husbands vehicle (which gets poorer gas mileage, but we need the 4 wheel drive filled during hurricane season just for safety reasons) was over $70. I don’t have room to keep a cow, but I do have room for a milking goat. Do you know anything about them? God bless, Country Lady Comment by ~Country Lady~ | September 26, 2008 |

5. Country Lady, We started out with a milk goat. They give a little under a 1/2 gallon a day, if milked twice a day. But for us, my son was the only one who like the goats milk. If I were you, I would try and taste someone's fresh raw goats milk first. Before you spend money on a goat and everything that goes with keeping a goat. There is a big difference in goat and cow milk. Some people like one and not the other. Looking back, I wish we had tasted it first. Well, it’s just a lesson learned. Please let me know what you think. Have a blessed day. Becky Comment by jordansfarm | September 27, 2008 |